Saṃsāra

After a long time trying to conquer the peak, to find a point that you can see everywhere from, you find yourself got nothing. You've just climbed a little hill. And there are a lot of endless mountains that you could never pass. And… you are on your own. No one wants to be with you any more…

Strong willing

Well, I was reviewing the book Summit 1A to be ready for the final exam. Actually I think I haven't passed this book well enough. Actually I had some problems and I wasn't in a good sort of studying, so I missed a lot of things. But now I really want to compensate this term.

A new day have come

The hardest part has just started...

I'lI see you at Tony's. I'm gonna clean them all...

Leon: Mathilda, since I met you, everything’s been different. So I… just need some time alone. And you need some time to grow up a little.
Mathilda: I’ve finished growing up, Leon. I just get older.
Leon: For me, it’s the opposite. I’m... old enough. I need time to grow up.

Just like a horse

Lately, I've been like a horse that its eye's were covered and a truculent horseman is lashing it with a whip and the poor horse has no choice but running, running and running. And I wish you could know the horseman…

You were wrong

I'm tired of thinking of future. Why am I doing this? Why am I so afraid of being regret after a true decision? Who've told that I have to be this worry about what I cannot do anything to change it?

This has been always my problem since my father told everybody that my son is someone else, he is a wise boy, he is more than his age, and he always knows how to do the right thing.

But, I'm not the son whose father believes in him. I'm not. I'm not the one who makes the best decisions. I'm not the one who lives in the real world. I'm not the one who I am. I'm just pretending to be a good guy. And this is the biggest failure. I hate it.

A good year!

This year didn't start well for me. The first months were awful. I wasted a lot of time and I was always sad during those months. These late months were great, though. I changed a lot, and I made a couple of good decisions.

But the funny point is that my life has started to speed. It is moving a little faster than I am! Changes are happening one after another and opportunities show themselves to me every day. And I don't know what to do. I have some problems with managing my time but I'd like this situation better.